“She’s 35 and single? No wonder she is always full of anger and bitterness.†How many times have you heard this line used to describe a woman? How many times have you heard a woman in her 30s who is single described as “difficult� I’ve lost count of how often people around me insist that by age 30 I need to have a husband or at least a fiancé. Is there really anything wrong with being single and in your 30s?
It’s funny how if you’re a woman and you clock 30 people start judging you. It’s even worse if you happen to be successful. If you happen to have a high flying career and seem to be in a position of power you need to have a husband by your side. At least that’s what I see to hear from people. If not, people will attack you in all ways possible labeling you bitter, angry, difficult, a shrew. What I don’t get is why the hate?
Are we as society so hell bent on bringing down the strong and independent woman? I’m starting to think we do have something against a woman who can stand on her own. Men in particular seem threatened by the idea of a successful woman who can do almost everything on her own. If she has a better job and does not rely on them for the smallest of things like changing the wheels of the car, they run for the hills. If she has a position of power in a really good company and comfortably calls the shots and expects them to be followed then she is not someone they want to date.
There seems to be some different standards applied to women in their 30s and men in their 30s. It’s ok for the men to be successful, but a woman with the same level of success is a no-no. The men are hailed as ambitious, career-focused and smart. It doesn’t matter if they are married or not. But if you are a woman, they will attack you for this. If you happen to be married they night go easy on you but the single one takes the blame for her status. She is accused of being too busy at work and not giving men a chance to woo them and make them wives.
We-and by we, I mean both men and women – are too quick to judge the woman in her 30s who is still single. We feel like she is failing in some way. Most of us think that by that age she should be planning to settle down or already starting a family. We prey on the woman in her 30s and decide to take her down by targeting her insecurities. You will say she is not woman enough for being single at her age, say she isn’t pretty. Some will even be labeled lesbians. We make it seem like being single and in your 30s is a huge crime.
I think it’s time we got back on the right track and cease attacking women in their 30s. There is nothing wrong with being single, over 30, female and successful. You as a woman defined yourself. If you are happy being single and over 30 then go for it. Do not be forced into marriage and relationships to please society. There is no age limit to when being single is unacceptable.