The strangest stories I’ve heard about online dating are those that I watched on the MTV series, Catfish. I knew that it doesn’t get weirder than someone pretending to be someone he isn’t. Well, this week I learnt there are more than fifty shades to the strangeness of finding love online.
A distraught Tia called in on a radio show asking for help to find her missing pubic hair. She had met a man named Noel Kipchumba on Facebook and after exchanging contacts and maintaining correspondence for a while, they decided to meet in person. They booked a hotel room and according to Tia, everything went well until she woke up the following morning to find her vagina shaved clean, and Noel Kipchumba, nowhere to be found. She tried calling him to no avail. She requested the radio station and anyone else who knew where to find him to help her locate him and tell her exactly where he took her pubic hair and why he did what he did.
Noel Kipchumba was eventually found and was asked to offer an explanation. For him, it was simple really. He fancies a vagina that is completely shaven so he did the ‘logical’ thing and shaved Tia’s while she slept. He did this to teach her a lesson on cleanliness and that ‘good girls should always shave, and shave it clean’.
The lesson to be learned here is that partners should learn more about each other before they get intimate. Men should also stick to their lane and not pretend to have agency over women’s bodies no matter how pure their intentions are.
The story as shared on Twitter and on YouTube is below.
Noel Kipchumba, you met a girl, laid mad pipe, shaved her while she was asleep & left with her pubes. She is looking for you. Pick her calls
— MM (@mercymurugi) June 20, 2017
I need to find a way to send that audio to you peeps.
— MM (@mercymurugi) June 20, 2017
So I have managed to put the audio in a video format. Here goes. Tia aliyetiwa anakuhitaji. pic.twitter.com/z1r0MwFicw
— MM (@mercymurugi) June 20, 2017