The first memory I have of a soap opera is the Bold and The Beautiful. I think I was about seven when I watched it with my grandparents. Back then I didn’t know what romance and love was all about. I just kept wondering why they keep screaming, crying and what I later came to find out was kissing. I loved watching it and would even quote a few of their scenes. Obviously, no one wanted me to watch it, it wasn’t good for me. But I pouted, got my way and watched it. That started my addiction to all things romantic.
As I grew older, I watched more and more soap operas. There was a lot to choose from as the Mexican soaps hit Kenyan TV. As a teenager, they were my guide to love. I used them as a reference tool for how to get and keep a boyfriend. Needless to say most of the stunts I used didn’t work out. When it all failed and I went through my first heartbreak, I gave up on soap operas.
For a while, I loathed soap operas. I couldn’t stand them and I figured, they all lie to girls. They portray men as an Adonis who will sweep me off my feet yet the reality is the complete opposite. I thought that they taught women how to manipulate and use craziness to get their man. They gave us false hope and extremely unrealistic expectations. But is that the only thing I could take away from soap operas?
While in campus I came to learn about the whole origin of soaps and what role they were intended to play in society. It’s all about empowering the women, making her work hard to improve her life. At least that’s what I got from my lecturer. So once again, my thoughts and feelings on soap operas changed. I was no longer a fan, but I was also not skeptical. I had an open mind to the idea of soap operas. So I sat down and watched a few with my mum. And as usual, it got me thinking. Can we learn anything from soap operas? Other than giving us the false hope and expectations and wanting an Alejandro kind of guy can we as women learn more from it?
I like over-analyzing things. So I took some time and watched more soap operas just to see what I could learn from it. Soap operas are more than just the storyline. It is more than just being about boy meets girl, they fall in love, something comes in between, and they break up, hate each other and eventually get back together. Most people will tell you “why watch it when I know what will happen in the end?†But that whole journey to the ending is what gets me. That’s why I find soap operas to be a good thing.
There is something to learn from the protagonists as they try to overcome all these obstacles and be with the person they love. There is the whole lesson of how the antagonists do not end up with what they want. That whole journey is a life lesson. A lesson on how hard work can get you results. A lesson on how to let go when your love is not reciprocated. You learn a lot watching the characters.
While people say soap operas are ruining women’s ideologies, I think it’s actually helping them. It’s showing women what they want in life. You might not get that Alejandro man. But it helps you know that once in a while you want flowers and chocolates. You want your man to show some sensitivity and him going out of his way to be with you. There are a lot of ups and downs that the characters go through. It shows you how to persevere and deal with issues thrown your way. It gives you the strength to not give up. It might sound corny, but soap operas have can teach men about what women want, if they paid attention things would work for them.
I don’t know what others think, but I think the soap opera mentality can be a good thing. But only if instead of thinking in terms of fantasies, it makes us see the reality of life.